"I wouldn't trust her with a bucket of water if my knickers were on fire."
"He's out of his depth on a wet pavement."
"A good plan isn't one where someone wins, it's where nobody thinks they've lost."
“…. with bags and bags of style."
"The purpose of this report is to let you know where we are. We are in the deep cack. It couldn't be worse if it were raining lava and pink slips. Any questions?"
"Progress just means bad things happen faster."
"I can scream bloody murder in four languages, and just scream in another forty-four."
"I'm made up of everyone I've ever met who's changed the way I think."
"The wages of sin is death but so is the salary of virtue, and at least the evil get to go home early on Fridays."
"My philosophy of life is to do what seems like a good idea at the time, and do it as hard as possible. It has never let me down."