The Crossroads of the Aether
Having recently watched this wonderful short tv programme called My Transsexual Summer (about these group of transsexual people who go on a retreat and they support and help each other) and it somehow felt very close to home, BUT! I've never ever thought "hey! I'd rather be a boy" and those kinds of things, but I do however enjoy playing shapeshifter in roleplay and games and the such and being both genders. At this, I realised I do tend to feel both like a woman, and a guy (depending on different situations) I often tried to describe how I saw myself as like a transgender guy who became a girl or like a flamboyant gay guy who prefers dressing in feminine clothing. I enjoy being girly, and wearing girly things, but sometimes the way I act and feel just doesn't fit into "I AM WOMAN" box, that and the way I think and learn. I'm a very visual learner which is more often associated with men than women.
Sometimes I wish I were able to switch between being a woman and a man because it'd be fun and suit whatever mood I'm in, but the unfortunate case is that people can't really do that.
I don't enjoy being defined as a "WOMAN", I like people to not see me as my gender but as who I am. I sometimes dress sexy lady, other times neutral ambiguous mysterio. I wouldn't say I am both boy AND girl, I feel more like an undefined non-specific gender with a very sexy lady's body. *wink wink nudge nudge*
I'd like to know what other people think, and if there are any other androfolk out there~
LBE
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Permalink Reply by Professor M. W. Fezziwig on December 9, 2011 at 1:49pm What an interesting thought. To be able to shift between genders would be something wonderful in my opinion as well. Being a trans-man I have had the opportunity to live part of my life as a woman and another as a male. I was born and raised female up until I was in my late 20s when I decided to officially begin hormone therapy and transition. I've always felt comfortable with both sides of my sexuality and though I am passable as male now I still enjoy feminine things. Hell, I make doll clothing for a living, but I have never felt the need to contain my activities to those of male vs female so that hasn't changed with the addition of a hairy chin. I will say that the way others see you does affect how they treat you. I have seen how women behave in the company of other women and men in the company of other men and oh how different it is than how they both behave in the company of the opposite sex. ;)
But to get back to your original question, I don't feel that I fall completely into the 'woman' or the 'man' box all together either. I have the worst time trying to explain to others why I would attempt to change my gender to male when I am most attracted to males. It's simply not about sex, it's about what's in our heads and hearts and matching the outside to reflect that. I think each of us should feel free to express who we are in our words, our clothing or any other way that makes us feel confident in who we are when we look in the mirror.
Permalink Reply by Kshni on May 4, 2012 at 3:44am I just dont see any logic in swearing. It serves no purose other then agrivate others
It's a way to vent one's frustration when one is not permitted to beat the stupid out of another person or object. I'll take swearing any day over someone hitting me.
It's unfortunate your family mentally abused you, those are scars that don't physically show and are often more challenging to repair and overcome.
Permalink Reply by Kshni on May 19, 2012 at 3:02am For me I would build an inukshuk and destroy it to vent. I am incapable of showing agression towards another living person.
I generally stiffle my aggression, which means I tend to be passive-aggressive because I wasn't taught by my caregivers how to express anger in a healthy, safe and constructive manner. I'm working to rectify this but I have my moments...
It goes against everythign I believe despite the fact I was beat to a pulp for 6 years by an alcaholic. It's funny how the doctors said me and my brother would be extremely violent and resent society growing up.
Sometimes, people who were raised in a violent environment become violent and sometimes, they become pacifists because they recognise the horror and don't desire to repeat it.
Either way on May 26 I will go outside as my true self for the first time in a big city, and the first time takign public transit.
Good luck with your experiment, I wish you every success and happiness. Focus on having a good time, visualise yourself as safe and happy, smile at people. If you look or act like a victim, other people pick up on that and will use it against you. Be confident, it does help!
Permalink Reply by Professor Argon Bats on August 15, 2012 at 3:37pm When you find the sex-swap magic wand, give me one! I've wanted me one for two decades LOL
I'm definitely a "both". For years, from puberty, I wanted to be male, but I never considered transgender surgery/treatments seriously because I felt like at best, with my slender build, I could become a frail and not quite fully anatomically functional male, so why bother. I'm not saying that I disagree with people doing it, or that the results are unsatisfactory, I just never felt like it would work for me personally. I have wondered, at times, whether that was the right choice, but I came to terms with and got to very much enjoy femaleness as well. I am in a hetero relationship now, but I definitely enjoy being "male" that way too. I do enjoy dressing in sexy or elegant feminine garb, but I couldn't live in a society where I can't wear army pants most of the time :-) I could name dozens of example of characteristics that are supposed to be more male than female, but to be honest, I think so much of that is cultural rather than biological anyhow. It is interesting, by the way, how biology responds to behavior and environment. For example, since being heterosexual for some years, my always erratic cycles have stabilized to boring and annoyingly normally-frequent monthliness, and I have grown a real A-cup size soft girly bosom. Sorry if this is too much information, I figured this kind of forum could stomach it.
Permalink Reply by Professor Argon Bats on August 15, 2012 at 6:22pm Don't get me started on religion.
Permalink Reply by G.A. Jack Hammerquist on August 15, 2012 at 4:28pm First off I in no way intend to disrespect anyone with what I am about to say... With that said.... I have known gay peoples, I have met lots of Transgender peoples here in the Empire. And I have done some reading on hermaphrodites and the causes and the effects. (There are 5 types of hermaphrodites... as follows, mostly male with a vagina, slightly less male, neither male nor female. mostly female with a penis, and slightly less female. Only the middle one can be seen from birth and the doctors know exactly how the child will turn out. The others... not so much. A lot of parent (in days gone by) tended to turn the child female. And I quote "It is easier to make a hole than make a pole." The down side for these "altered" kids is sometime the biology does not match the physiology. Meaning the child is sometimes suppose to be a boy even though he has a vagina, or vise versa. This leaves the child feeling out of sorts for the rest of their lives. Today the doctors tend to advise the parents wait to see what the child leans toward then when they are old enough to have the proper surgery.
As for the differences between transgender and gays... it has been my experience to date that those who are Transgender are not choosing to live that way. They have a true disconnect between their self image and the body they were born with. It is not about getting to have sex with the same sex as they are it is all about there true self image.
Gays on the other hand... it is sometimes a choice... in fact most of the time... (why I have no clue) it is not about biology at all or genes. Sometimes it is caused by trauma... usually child abuse in one form or another.
What I personally have dealt with.... well I do not feel that sharing it in such an open manner would be good for me...
I am male... 100% I have no interest in men. In fact I see it as a miracle (if woman saw men as I do for the most part) that this race has gone on for as long as it has.... I hope someday to meet and fall in love again with a woman who would be willing to love me as much as I would love her... So far... no such luck.
For those of you who are Transgender.. for what it is worth, you have my support.
Permalink Reply by G.A. Jack Hammerquist on August 19, 2012 at 1:59pm Yes I agree that those who most often cry "Tolerance" are in face the most intolerant of them all.. How certain religions treat people by degrading them is wrong.
Such as how the radical Muslim faith claims they are the only holy religion and that all others must convert or die. Not much tolerance there... What really makes me crazy is that there are thousands who say it is a religion of peace. But the ones who make that claim have never read the Quran (sp) The Muslims would put to death all who are transsexual or otherwise. They have done it in the past and do it today.
So why in Gods green earth would any liberal support such a faith. I know the answer... do you?
Permalink Reply by Professor Argon Bats on August 19, 2012 at 2:10pm I would argue that there is not much difference in this regard from Christian religions, especially Catholicism. Just take a look at history to convince yourself of the "peaceful" nature of that set belief system. Perhaps religions have a time course - casual temporal perusal suggests Islam is simply a younger religion than Christianity and is just now in its "teenage" years of being most aggressive: compare Christianity in the middle ages. Just a hypothesis, mind.
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